NYC SUCKS BALLS
Mike Leitao ~ 09/16/2024
One of the first articles written on this website was an article titled “Nashville Sucks Balls” by our glorious Editor-In-Chief and part-time god, Sam. And as someone who also thinks certain cities suck balls, I thought it was about time I gave my opinion on a city full of homeless, druggies, scammers, and general awfulness, the big apple, New York City. I fucking hate New York, it is the worst. Having just been back this past weekend, in around a year since, it truly reminded me just how much I despise the shit hole that is NYC. Hundreds of streets in a grid pattern where every sidewalk is full of awful human beings where, sometimes, it makes you wonder if this is a real place or just a sick and twisted experimental zone different countries observe to see how awful society can truthfully be.
Easily the worst part of NYC is the general filth. The streets and sidewalks are littered with a combination of bird and human shit, homelessness, rats and other rodents, and trash from water bottles, to used heroin needles. It is impossible to spend a day in NYC and not come home and need an hour-long shower to at least get the feeling of disgust off of you. One thing I notice about NYC homeless compared to the rest of America is that most of the ones in NYC are not even begging for money. They have just fully given up on life and are not even putting in any effort to try and work their way up, but instead just sleep in the middle of walkways and search through trash bins for something they can eat or drink. Combine that with the fact that every 5 steps there is another homeless person and the city is just an all-around gross and depressing place to be.
Once you get over all the filth, you notice that between all the homeless are other people who are actively overdosing on drugs. Just take a quick look down every street in the city and you will probably notice at least one person who is passed out on the ground from their insane drug overdose. There are other cities in America with homelessness and drug addicts that feel so much less safe compared to NYC and I think it is because all of these homeless and druggies just keep to themselves and their real inconvenience to everyone is just taking up large sections of sidewalks with their prone and borderline diseased bodies.
Even though most of the real filth in the city is from those mentioned above, the true filth comes from the amount of people on every corner trying to scam people and sell them whatever bullshit they have to make a quick buck. Over the roughly 25 blocks I walked this past weekend in NYC I must’ve seen at least 50 scammers all selling a different piece of bullshit. Whether its people selling supposed fresh fruit, vendors setting up tables and selling fake luxury brand items, people dressed up as different characters from movies or shows and getting photos with people then charging them a shit ton of money. I hate scammers, they are the scum of the earth who are too untalented and competent at life to do anything to make real money so they have to patrol the streets like mice looking for their next meal.
If it was up to me, I would have cops in the city patrolling and finding scammers then beating the shit out of them to maybe try and teach them a lesson. The only people in NYC making some quick money I can respect are street performers since at the very least they are providing some type of service and entertainment for people so they actually deserve some money. You add the fact the city is so full of tourists (which I will get to momentarily) and it makes these scammers even more shitty since they are taking from people who might not even speak the language and not know any better. Combining the actual filth of NYC with the morale filth of every street corner being overrun with scammers, makes being anywhere in the city a nightmare.
I understand that tourism is a big part of not just NYC’s economy, but of the economy as a whole. I fully get that, but it does not change the fact that being stuck in an overcrowded city on overcrowded streets full of a bunch of people who have no clue what the hell is going on and just mindlessly wandering blows. When I am in the city, I like to get where I need to go as fast as possible since the less time I have to spend on the streets and in the city, the better. So being stuck in what feels like endless crowds of people moving slowly, stopping to take a photo of every fucking pigeon and homeless man on the ground, pausing to talk to every scammer they come across, and taking photos of all the yellow taxis and tour buses, it makes traversing the city a literal hell. Then, you finally get to where you are trying to go, but of course, it also is filled to capacity with tourists who have no clue what they are even doing there. So if you are at a store trying to buy something, have fun weaving around a million people and waiting in line forever because no one understands sales tax. You are at a location for an event? Enjoy being stuck in a crowd moving at a snail's pace because they don't understand the layout of the building even though it has clear signs, and then you end up missing the beginning of your event because you couldn't get to your seat on time.
I am not saying that every second and every inch of NYC is bad. I enjoy how many amazing and unique restaurants there are to go to and get incredible food, there is some really unique shopping that is hard to get anywhere else especially locally, and Broadway is one of my favorite areas of the city and the shows are always great. But those few positives of NYC, no matter how great they may be, will never be able to outweigh the fact that getting to New York blows, traveling through New York sucks, and by the time you finally arrive to where you wanted to be and whole reason you came to the city anyways, will most likely be underwhelming because of the amount of stupid people you have to deal with.
