FROM THE COUCH:
The Useless Myrtle Beach Bowl, Overrated Deion Loses To The Mormons, Pop-Tarts Run Wild, Indiana Whooped, SMU’s Incredible Embarrassment, Texas And Ohio State Cruise Right Along, And More…
Mike Leitao ~ 1/1/2025
Oh shit it's week 16 of From The Couch. Let us discuss the magical number that is 16. You can go get your driver's license meaning you are basically an adult, in the latter years of high school meaning you only have a couple years left until you have to do taxes and stuff. 16 is also a square root which is pretty cool I guess. Uhhh. Ummm. Yeah that's all I got, let us get on with the article. Oh, and for all those excited about my riveting opinion on the Myrtle Beach Bowl between two 6-6 teams, get a life I am not writing about that dumb shit.
Coastal Carolina vs UTSA (Myrtle Beach Bowl):
Damn, you actually thought I was gonna write about this. Wild. Get fucked.
BYU vs Colorado (Alamo Bowl):
Maybe I’m a hater, maybe I’m a grouchy man, but there are very few things I love more than watching Colorado lose. Seeing this overrated team that shouldn’t have even been ranked lose by over 20 points in a bowl game to a clearly better team puts a smile on my face. With this being the end of the road for Colorado, their season over, and their best players now getting ready for the draft, it will be time for Deion to be under a true test to see if he is actually a good coach or just overhyped (I’ll give you a hint, its the latter). For BYU, congrats, I guess. Go drink all the apple juice you want or whatever it is Mormons do.
Iowa State vs Miami (Pop-Tarts Bowl):
Iowa State won by one point mainly because Cam Ward really only played to get the FBS record he wanted, then he decided this game meant nothing to him. Cool, that is the rundown of the actual game. Now let us talk about the true MVP of this bowl game, the Pop-Tarts. I do not know what kind of drugs these guys in the Pop-Tart suits were on, but I need them. They were seriously the best thing about this game by a longshot. Between the Hulk Hogan impression while ripping off the foil cover, the Pop-Tart literally messing with the refs during the game, running all around in the background of the winning coaches interview, getting toasted alive and then being eaten by the players, it felt like a fever dream. But the best thing about this game was the strawberry Pop-Tart, who was eaten last year, returning from the dead atop the stadium. Seriously, who came up with this shit, and how do I meet them?
Indiana vs Notre Dame (CFP Round 1):
Wow, it’s almost like I said Indiana is not that good. Now, fair play to Indiana, they were actually the team that lost by the smallest margin (they lost by 10, which should be an indicator to how the rest of the games went). Even with that being the truth, they entered the 4th quarter down 20-3, so it is not like the game was close at all. Could not get anything going rushing the football and the passing game was mediocre at best. Meanwhile, Notre Dame took care of business with another solid, if unspectacular, performance. Indiana’s season is over (no one cares), and Notre Dame prepares to play Georgia in what should be a very close game.
SMU vs Penn State (CFP Round 1):
We go from our closest game to the least closest game. Penn State won by 28 points and was up going into halftime 28-0. Although SMU managed an impressive 10 points, it was not enough to even sniff a potential win. Penn State dominated on the ground while also stuffing SMU every time they tried to run the football. And if you aren’t running the football well and your QB ends up with 3 interceptions, it is a safe bet to assume they did not stand a chance. SMU will easily be the talk of the offseason after losing to Clemson for the ACC title but still earning a shot in the dance over teams like Alabama and Miami who were clearly better. Now let me just say that yes, I do think it was fine that SMU made it because if you just take the team you think is better regardless of wins and losses, it defeats the purpose of playing a regular season. With that being said, it doesn’t change the fact that SMU’s embarrassment of a game will have people demanding they don’t give out pity bids to the dance next season. Up next for Penn State is a matchup with Boise State, and if they beat them easily too there is a legitimate possibility that the playoff formatting might experience some tweaking this offseason.
Clemson vs Texas (CFP Round 1):
This was a game that happened. I don’t know why, but this game did not interest me at all. From an offensive standpoint it was actually decent, with over 900 yards of offense and over 60 points scored. But, Clemson just was not an interesting team to me. There was a reason Texas were 14-point favorites, and it is because Clemson just was not looked at as serious competition. With an over/under of 50 combined with the 14 point spread, odds makers thought this game would end with a score of around 32-18 in favor of Texas. Every other team in the playoffs based on odds were projected to score 20+ points. Clemson sucks, Texas gets Arizona State in another match up that could have major implications in the offseason regarding a tweaking to the playoff format.
Tennessee vs Ohio State (CFP Round 1):
The game most fans were looking forward to for the first round of the playoffs. Two very good teams and a matchup between the 8 and 9 seeds, this had the potential to be an outstanding game. Instead, Ohio State embarrassed them by 25 points and had a 21-0 lead at the end of the first quarter. To put into perspective, if Ohio State did not score another point all game, they still would’ve won by a score of 21-17. Tennessee was simply outclassed on offense, not being able to get anything going. They were dominated the whole game, only putting together two good drives, one coming at the end of the game when nothing mattered anymore. Unlike the other teams mentioned, Tennessee was actually supposed to be good and seemed like a real threat to not only beat Ohio State but potentially move on even more throughout the playoffs. Instead, they got smashed and all the higher seeds advanced. One of the things that is great about college football is the upsets and the playoffs so far have not delivered. We will have to wait and see if the final 8 can provide us with some more excitement, or prove that an expansion to 12 teams does nothing but drag the process out.
