FROM THE COUCH:

C-USA is boring, Jeanty Is For Real, LET’S GO ARMY, Mormons Get Robbed, An Ohio Battle Nobody Cares About, Marshall - You’re Welcome, The REAL NCAA football rankings, and more!

Mike Leitao ~ 12/12/2024

Let me tell you all about the number 14. Just kidding, fuck that, 14 is super boring. It was conference championship week in college football meaningless games but more important. We also got the college football playoff selections that of course everyone agreed with and there were no complaints whatsoever. No more funny business, time to jump right into the action.

Western Kentucky vs Jacksonville State (Conference USA Championship)

This was, in fact, a game that happened. You know when you go out to eat and you get free chips or bread to open your meal but it’s stale. At the end of the day even if it’s not great it’s not like your entire meal hinged on this one item and let’s be honest we are all still gonna eat some of it no matter what. Anyways, yeah woohoo Jacksonville State committed murder this game.

UNLV vs Boise State (Mountain West Championship)

Give that man the Heisman. I’ll touch on the seeding and the playoffs later, but this man Jeanty is special. Dragged this mid Boise State team not just to a ranked position, not just to a conference championship, but to a playoff spot and a first round bye. A truly special performer who will most likely be setting a new college football record that was previously held by RB GOAT Barry Sanders. Pretty good company if you ask me.

Tulane vs Army (AAC Championship)

Let me take a deep breath. LETS GO ARMY, YOU ARE THE BEST. AAC CHAMPIONS BABY, YOU DID IT! The journey has been well documented here. Other than the loss to Notre Dame, Army had about as good of a season as they possibly could’ve. Of course, at the end of the day the only thing that matters is the Army vs Navy game this upcoming week. I come from a Navy family, so unfortunately my love of Army and their quest for college football gold this year will need to take a break this week, as we hope Navy can BEAT ARMY.

Iowa State vs Arizona State (Big 12 Championship)

I don’t care about either of these teams. They mean nothing to me. I feel like we were robbed of BYU in this spot, and potentially getting a first round bye. I’m confident if the Mormon homies would’ve been in this game they would’ve won, but instead they were disrespected and their consolation prize is a bowl game versus Colorado. When Arizona State loses in their first game by multiple TDs, don’t forget who knew who the real Big 12 rep should’ve been.

Ohio U vs Miami of Ohio (MAC Championship)

Uh. Um. So. This game. Well, it was Ohio vs Ohio which is cool I guess. I’m gonna be honest, I’m grasping at straws here. This was just a conference championship game that happened. No one watched it. No one cares about it. I’m not even gonna tell you who won, cause believe me, I know you don’t care.

Georgia vs Texas (SEC Championship)

Probably the most hyped conference championship game from this week. Makes sense, two legitimate contenders for the national championship not only playing for their conference championship but also a chance at a first round bye on their quest for the national championship. This game was incredible, one of those low scoring affairs that still keeps you hooked and watching the whole time. Texas honestly played better I think, but once OT hit it was one drive vs one drive, and Georgia came out on top. I think the only thing I would’ve changed in this game is make it go from one OT to about 10, because that would’ve made this game go from great to special.

Marshall vs Louisiana (Sun Belt Championship)

I always feel a strange connection to Marshall. I have no reason to, I know no one who went there and have no connection to it. Yet for some reason, I find myself rooting for them throughout the year. Because of this, I am going to officially declare the only reason they are Sun Belt champions is because of my interest in them. To Marshall and all their fans, you're welcome. Please send all fan mail to 180 Greenwich St, New York, NY.

Clemson vs SMU (ACC Championship)

Going from a game where I was happy with the outcome to one I was pissed about. Clemson is just such a meh school to me, I never want to see them succeed since they are so boring in my mind. SMU winning would’ve been way more cool, but then again they stay higher ranked compared to Clemson and don’t match up with Texas in the first round, so I guess if you are a SMU fan you can’t be too upset with the way it all shook out.

Penn State vs Oregon (Big 10 Championship)

After being given a golden opportunity from Ohio State shitting the bed last week, all questions were on PSU head coach James Franklin and if he could win a big game. We confirmed, he can’t. I want Penn State to succeed, I have multiple family members who went there and I normally root for them in college football, but they are the biggest big game chokers in the league. Versus a non top-10 team I’m taking Penn State, but the second I got a matchup versus a top-10 team I'd rather have Kennesaw State, since I feel they’d give me a better chance at winning. At the end of the day though, it was still at least a good and entertaining game to watch to end off the championship games, which as a college football fan is all you can ask for.

College Football Playoffs:

I’m not gonna spend the time to list off the matchups or the seeding, I’m gonna assume everyone reading either knows them or knows how to use Google to find them. Let’s just hop right into comments and disagreements, since negativity is where I shine. I like Boise State, and with Jeanty they can beat anyone, but them being ranked 3rd is a bit rich for my blood. Arizona State doesn’t even deserve to be here, should’ve been BYU. I may hate Notre Dame, but I do think there is an argument to be made that they should’ve been ranked 6th overall and ahead of Penn State, which I would normally say doesn’t matter but that’s the difference between a matchup with SMU or Indiana and then a second round matchup of Georgia or Boise State. Indiana doesn’t impress me, they played two games versus teams with above .500 records which resulted in a 1-1 record with their win coming by 5 and their loss coming by 23. I suspect they will not make much noise. Clemson probably should be higher than SMU since they won the conference championship, kinda just feels like the clear cut better choice. And lastly, I’m happy SMU made it, and I understand that there is a level of needing to leave a potentially better team out to respect records and all that, but let’s be honest it would’ve been better if it was Alabama.

So, with those complaints outta the way, allow me to give you what my ranking would’ve been for the college football playoffs.

  1. Oregon

  2. Georgia

  3. Boise State

  4. BYU (will die on this hill, I don’t care)

  5. Texas

  6. Notre Dame

  7. Penn State

  8. Ohio State

  9. Tennessee

  10. Clemson

  11. Alabama

  12. Army (again, will die on this hill)

Assuming the college football committee was smart like me and made this decision, we would’ve been in for a much better tournament to crown the national champion. But alas, not everyone can be as smart as I, so all we can have is these rankings as a memory of what could’ve been.